8 Things That Become Annoying After Becoming a Parent

Before becoming a parent, I probably could have come up with a pretty decent list of things that annoyed me. Things like people chewing with their mouths open and slow drivers in the fast lane mostly just the obvious offenders that annoy most other people too. But since become a parent? Well, let’s just say that the list of annoyances has grown exponentially, though most of the things that make the list are things that would’ve been no big deal in the pre-parent days. Here are lists of things that have become annoying since becoming a parent.

1. The UPS guy who rings the doorbell

Pre-kids, the UPS guy ringing my doorbell was a neutral event in my day. Actually, it was probably an enjoyable event in my day; because it meant some fun item or another awaited me in a package. Now I sort of want to punch the UPS guy (or anyone for that matter) who dares to ring my door bell and wake my baby from his nap.

2. The fact that Costco doesn’t open until 10:00 AM

Before parenthood, I rarely tackled errands before 10:00 AM—because, sleeping in on Saturdays. But now? 10:00 AM rolls around and I’ve probably been up for four hours. I mean, seriously? The day is halfway over by 10:00, Costco. The parents of this nation need economy size boxes of baby wipes and 3-packs of milk and we need it before 10:00 AM. Perhaps I should start a petition.

3. The chatty checker at the grocery store

OK, this was a little annoying before kids as well, but after kids it’s on another level. I’m sorry chatty checker, I really don’t want to hear your life story and I definitely don’t want to tell you mine while my kid is making a mess. I don’t even care. Not even a little bit.

4. Any and all lines

Waiting in lines is never a super fun task for anyone, but it had always just been a part of life. But waiting in lines with kids can be downright hellish. And waiting in line behind someone whose club card isn’t working or who can’t find a coupon while my kid is crying doing even get me started.

5.People who get offended by public breastfeeding

Before becoming a parent, I recognized that some people just don’t feel comfortable with breastfeeding in public. Even though I found it silly, it didn’t annoy me really. After becoming a parent, the ridiculousness of taking offense to breastfeeding annoys me to no end. Seriously people, you’ll see more cleavage walking past Victoria’s Secret on your mall walk then you’ll see while someone is feeding their baby. Get over it.

6.People who talk about their pets incessantly like they are their babies

I’ve never been a super huge animal person, but if other people want to compare and treat kids as a pet and talk about them as such who am I to resent them? Well, after having kids, I find the behavior a lot more annoying. And please do not compare your animal to my child. Totally not the same.

7.Phone calls over text

Talking on the phone is not my jam, but if I had information to communicate I had always been more than happy to give a quick phone call. Now, I basically send all phone calls straight to voicemail. I pretty much would like everyone I know to ask them before calling me: “Is this information that could be conveyed via a text message?” If the answer is yes, then please send a text. It will be much more pleasant for both of us to not have to carry on a conversation while my children yell in the background.

8.Glitter

I suppose the reason I never real took issue with glitter before having children is because I didn’t really have to encounter it very often in my daily life. In the adult world, very few things are festooned with glitter for glitter’s sake. Unfortunately I have learned that in the world of children glitter is on EVERYTHING. Literally everything. And subsequently it is all over my house as well. Glitter is most definitely the herpes of craft supplies and I wouldn’t be particularly sad if it no longer existed.

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Little Things That Mean a Lot to Kids

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Here are a few easy tricks to make your child smile.

  1. Go for a walk with just one child.
  2. Slip a note (and an occasional piece of chocolate ) into their lunch box.
  3. Say “yes” to something usually off-limits, like sitting on the counter.
  4. Show as much enthusiasm on amusement-park ridesas they do.
  5. When their room looks like a tsunami swept through it, close the door and get on with your day.
  6. Skype or do FaceTime with Grandmaevery now and then.
  7. If your child has given it a good try, but he’s still miserable and anxious and really, truly wants to quit the team, give him your blessing.
  8. Go ahead: Let your 4-year-old stomp in every puddle along the way. Even without rain boots.
  9. Take in a pet that needs a home and a child’s love.
  10. Give your toddler a chance to fight his own battles in the sandbox or on the playground before you intervene.
  11. Cultivate your own rituals and traditions: Taco Tuesdays, Sunday-afternoon bike ride, apple picking every fall. Our tradition is Pizza Night on Fridays J
  12. Ask your kid to teach you how to do something for a change. And once you get the hang of it, be sure to tell him what a good teacher he is.
  13. Let your child wear their dress-up clothesto the supermarket. All month if she wants to.
  14. Let your child overhear you saying something wonderful about them.
  15. Stay up late to see the full moon. There’s one on October 27.
  16. Print their childhood photos so they have something physical to look at one day.
  17. Don’t be in a hurry to tell your kid to let it go. He needs to vent too.
  18. Crank up the music in the middle of homework and have a dance party.
  19. Make a secret family handshake.
  20. Hang a whiteboard in their room to leave messages for each other.
  21. Start a pillow fight.
  22. Share your old diaries, photos, and letters from when you were their age.

11 Words That Have A Different Meaning After You Have Kids

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You think you have mastered the English language. You’re sure you know the meaning of these commonly used words, right? But then you have kids. And you realize that these words you thought you knew take on a whole new definition once you become a parent. Here are 11 words that you’ve had to relearn since having kids, with brand-spanking-new definitions.

  1. Tired

Pre-Kid Definition: Feeling sleepy

Post-Kid Definition: EXHAUUUUSTED. Frickin’ BEAT! A condition usually brought on by severe lack of sleep which happens night after night with no recovery. Every muscle in your body aches. You feel like you just competed in two Iron Mans back to back. Your eyeballs burn. SO, SHUT UP, PRE-KID DEFINITION!

  1. All-Nighter

Pre-Kid Definition: An entire nighttime period spent partying and having fun. No sleep is experienced because one is too busy drinking, dancing and being free. Being so free and alive. So free …

Post-Kid Definition: An entire nighttime period spent up with your baby or toddler who is crying incessantly and won’t go back down in her mother-‘effing crib. Like, she won’t stop crying and it’s making your face melt. And this goes on all night long.

  1. Quickly

Pre-Kid Definition: Doing something with swiftness, efficiency, in a short amount of time.

Post-Kid Definiton: Leaving the house before noon. Or getting out of the grocery store in less than 2 hours.

Pants
Pre-Kid Definition: Trousers or nicely ironed slacks or skinny jeans
Post-Kid Definition: As in, yoga

  1. Eating Out

Pre-Kid Definition: Going to a restaurant and enjoying a leisurely meal wherein you eat and possibly have a glass or two of wine while you talk about world issues and/or the latest episode of RHOBH.

Post-Kid Definition: Going to a restaurant with the hopes of getting food in your belly before you a) either leave voluntarily with ranch dressing across your shirt and tears in your eyes, or b) are kindly asked to leave by the restaurant manager after more than 3 surrounding tables complain about the croutons flying from the circus happening at your table.

  1. Nap

Pre-Kid Definition: A brief episode of sleep, usually taken mid-day to rejuvenate and reenergize. Perhaps taken in a hammock after just a few beers or a delicious, slowly eaten meal.

Post-Kid Definition: Something that is a daily struggle to get your baby or toddler to do; something that doesn’t exist for you anymore, honey.

  1. Pants

Pre-Kid Definition: Trousers or nicely ironed slacks or skinny jeans

Post-Kid Definition: As in, yoga

  1. Sex

Pre-Kid Definition: Hot, torrid and potentially spur-of-the-moment boot-knocking that happens often and anywhere

Post-Kid Definition: A major event. Likely put on the calendar. To occur in your bedroom, done quietly as to not disturb young housemates, in an amount of time usually cut short by said housemates with a “MAAAAAHHHMMMM!” Or just crying, either of which pretty much kills the mood.

  1. Gross

Pre-Kid Definition: Very unpleasant, foul, even repulsive

Post-Kid Definition: BOW DOWN TO ME, PRE-KID DEFINITION!!!

  1. Chillin’

Pre-Kid Definition: Relaxing. Taking time to do absolutely nothing. Kicking it.

Post-Kid Definition: This word does not exist.

  1. Acceptable

Pre-Kid Definition: Able to be agreed upon. Suitable.

Post-Kid Definition: Whatever you can do — be it begging, bribing or surrendering — to get your small child to just put on her stupid pants.

  1. Love

Pre-Kid Definition: A feeling of deep affection or attachment

Post-Kid Definition: You never knew how your heart could burst with such happiness and intense affection for a tiny little human that looks sort of like you. Your soul lights up when you see him. Your heart aches when you are away from her. And you can’t even begin to imagine your life before they were in it. Even if you actually got sleep back then.

Once you have children, everything changes  even the definitions of words.

Via mom.me

7 Ways to maintain your marriage after a baby

7 Ways to maintain your marriage after a baby

Even the strongest bonds can be tested when the excitement of a brand new baby gives way to sleep deprivation, self-doubt and lack of communication. Want to keep your marriage strong as the two of you become a family? Here’s how:

  1. Split up

Wait, what? One of the most important things you can do for each other as a couple is to go your separate ways. It takes effort and a bit of planning, but continuing to pursue interests and friendships on your own makes you a better partner—and parent. But who really feels like meeting friends for a movie after a long day of caring for a baby? You may have to start small when your baby is young, especially if you’re breastfeeding and can’t be more than a feeding away. Take a walk on your own, escape to the backyard to call your BFF or just take a nap. Likewise, try and make sure your partner has time to pursue his interests as well. It won’t always be easy, but it’s important in the long run.

  1. Put your relationship first

Newborns put you into full-on survival mode, which makes it hard to take care of yourself, let alone your spouse. But the foundation of your new little family is the bond you’ve created with each other—and small steps you take to be thoughtful to each other pay off massively in the long run. Pouring that third cup of coffee? Pour one for your spouse, too. Think about how the baby affects each of you in different ways and acknowledge this. Dads, don’t use breastfeeding or “bonding” with mom as an excuse to back away from your spouse. She needs you now more than ever and she needs to feel that strong foundation underneath her feet.

  1. Coffee

Invest in a really good coffee pot. Enough said.

4. Laugh

Even when nothing seems funny—projectile spit up, overflowing diaper pail, nasty case of diaper rash—laughter is one of the most important things that can keep your marriage strong. Laughing together after a particularly challenging day helps you both stay sane. So put on that favorite funny DVD and share some laughs, even if you have to watch it half an hour at a time.

  1. Flirt

Seriously, who feels like getting busy when your boobs are leaking and you’re still wearing maternity undies? But those simmering urges might never come back if you don’t try and keep the fire stoked. Have an honest conversation about when you might be ready for more than a peck on the cheek, and make a pact to remember how you made the baby in the first place. A kiss in the kitchen, a hand lingering on your shoulder when he takes the baby for bath time, a wink across the room—it all keeps the fires warm, and helps you see each other as more than roommates. And when you’re ready to bring sexy back? The journey isn’t that far.

  1. Divide and conquer

Until you’ve had a baby, you just can’t explain it—babies are time sucks. It’s easy to think that you can run errands and get everything done just as easily with baby in tow, because they just sleep all day, right? Comparing your to-do lists and consolidating errands throughout the week takes a load off both of you, leaving more time for playing with your baby and enjoying your family.

  1. Listen

Whether your relationship was relatively new when your baby came into the picture or you’ve been married for a decade, listening is one of the most important things you can do to stay close. So even when your baby-frazzled mind can’t remember if you showered this morning, you both need to have at least a few minutes out of each day for real communication.

Babies are all sorts of awesome—and all sorts of exhausting. But keeping your relationship strong will result in a big payoff down the road. Like when you have a teenager.

 

What Parents Need to Know About the Child Who Died Under Dental Anesthesia

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Article original from Parents

Our hearts go out to the parents of the toddler who passed away during a dental procedure. And here’s what parents can take away from this unthinkable tragedy.

You may have read about Texas 14-month-old Daisy Lynn Torres, who passed away under anesthesia during a dental procedure back in March. But in case you’re seeing this heartbreaking story circulating again online, here’s what you need to know.

According to Yahoo News, a pediatric specialist at Austin Children’s Dentistry, Dr. Michael Melanson, at first informed Daisy’s mom, Betty Squier, that Daisy needed to be put under anesthesia to fill two cavities, because she wouldn’t be able to sit still long enough for the procedure.

But Squier recounted to Inside Edition that during the procedure, Dr. Melanson told her, “things have changed, [and it’s] six cavities. We’re going to go ahead and do 4 crowns and 2 fillings.”

Understandably, Squier wasn’t so sure putting a crown on baby teeth was necessary. But she explains, “I allowed him to do it because I trusted him.”

Unthinkably, Daisy went into cardiac arrest while under anesthesia. She was rushed to the hospital, where she later died.

The medical examiner concluded anesthesia likely killed this adorable little girl, according to the autopsy results. “One can only speculate as to why any treatment was performed considering no indication of dental disease or pathology,” the report also says.

In a statement to Inside Edition, Dr. Melanson’s attorney said, “There is no evidence that either the mother, the anesthesiologist, or the dentist did anything to cause the event. The best interest of the child was everyone’s only goal. Our hearts continue to go out to the family.”

As does mine. I am shattered for this mom.

Even worse is that this is not the first case of something like this happening. In July, a 3-year-old girl in California died after being put under anesthesia for a dental procedure, according to People magazine. And in January of 2014, a Hawaiian 3-year-old lapsed into a coma and later died after being placed under “heavy sedation” in the dentist’s chair, the Association of Health Care Journalists reports. And those are just the cases that made headlines. As the Huffington Post reports, 31 kids have died under dental sedation in the past 15 years.

Given this scary statistic, and in light of the tragedy that took the life of Daisy and other kids mentioned here, we talked to Jade Miller, D.D.S., president of the American Academy of Pediatric Dentistry (AAPD), to ask what parents should know. When asked how young might be too young for general anesthesia, Dr. Miller replied, “The primary factor to consider is the severity of the dental disease. Young children with dental pain and/or infection require treatment at any age. Alternatives should be assessed to determine all options that may be available. In some cases, a general anesthesia is the very best approach for that child and can be completed in a safe and effective manner.”

If your dentist recommends general anesthesia, Dr. Miller said to keep these three tips in mind:

  • Get ALL your questions answered. “We always recommend if a parent has any concerns or questions related to their child’s dental care to make sure they are answered to their satisfaction,” Dr. Miller said.
  • Don’t be afraid to seek a second opinion. If you’re uncomfortable with or have questions about your child’s diagnosis or treatment, there’s no harm in talking to your child’s dentist or getting a second opinion.
  • Know your options. “Parents should understand any alternatives to a general anesthesia, which could include a conscious sedation and the advantages and disadvantages of an alternative approach,” Dr. Miller said. “They should ask about where the procedure will take place, such as in a surgery center or a dental office, and the experience and training of the anesthesia provider.”

My son was 2 years-old when I first took him to the dentist when he broke his frontal tooth, my first nightmare and first question was about the anesthesia, if gradually during the process he will be under general anesthesia or some type of local anesthesia, but the answer was NO.

I realize Daisy’s procedure was completely different, but the point is that I can relate to Squier trusting a medical professional’s advice as to how her daughter should be treated. And then, to have this happen? It’s unimaginable.

10 ITEMS TO FEEL LESS STRESS WHEN YOU ARE TRAVELING WITH KIDS

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Traveling can be a problem sometimes with young kids. Traveling by train, by plane, by boat, or by car, most of us are hoping to spend the travel adventure with only minor injuries and the mental faculties not affected.

I have flown with my kid myself, I am familiar with this even that my kid is what you call an “easy traveler,” nothing promises me to make the family vacations trouble-free, but there are some things that can make it more relaxed.

1.KIDS CAR STORAGE BOX

Packed their toys and anything they want to bring for the trip, it will make them important on how they are part of this adventure, this storage box is easy to carry and spacious.

 

2. TODDLER BACKPACK WITH WHEELS

A carry-on full of things to keep them busy during the trip since they’re a little on the small side will give you a relax for a period of time, involve them on how to pack their suitcase and let them feel important and part of the trip.

 

3. WATER WOW

They’re mess-free, easy to refill, and can be used over and over. You fill the pen with water, and your child uses it to draw on and color the pages of these books, revealing colors and patterns as they wet the pictures. Once they dry, they go back to white and can be used again.

4. TODDLER TRAVEL NECK

I always keep looking in my rear-view mirror to see if my kid is already sleeping in the car seat when I take long distances, most of the time his head hanging in a position that makes his own neck hurt, place this pillow around their neck when they’re still awake, and they will be more comfortable when they fall sleep on the route.

5.ON THE GO POTTY SEAT

If you are traveling with your kids in the transition of being diapers free, do not risk traumatizing them into a regression after they fall into a public toilet. This seat folds flat and can be kept in your purse or diaper bag in a small bag.

6.COZY KIDS HEADPHONES

These are more comfortable and easier to keep on than regular headphones, my son is not on the age to get some of these but I found them amazing to keep them comfort specially traveling in a plane.

7.SNACK AND DRINK CUP

This genius invention is a drinking cup, and it holds snacks. They can dump the food in the main part of the cup, and their beverage is stored below. I found it amazing.

8.PAMPERS BIBSTERS

Getting everything that is disposable when you’re traveling is a plus for your stress free, these disposable bibs are practical and then you throw them with the rest of your trash.

9.SPOT IT NUMBERS AND SHAPES

Small toys and games are so convenient when traveling, is a fun way to pass the time and have some fun.

10. MAGNETIC WOODEN BLOCK SET

This toy for babies and toddlers is entertain and fun during the travel time, is perfect on the go going with you in your purse or diaper bag.

This post contains affiliate links, we receive a commission of the sale if you make a purchase using these link, prices are not extended.

Swim lessons, if a child starts crying what do you do?

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As a parent there is a long list of things you should do to help your crying child and the swim program that you’re at. We are going to first go through what a parent should do to keep their child from crying or reduce the tear time to a minimum. To prevent children crying at swim lessons:

  • Mentally prepare your child for the swimming experience

When you sign up for swim lessons inform your child that they will be participating in swim lessons. Let them know in clear terms that they will be learn how to go underwater like you do in the bathtub or shower, and will practice moving through the water safely.

  • Sing the songs from swim lessons, and use the same swim specific location language

If you can, get a hold of the swim lesson program’s song sheets or training guide to learn the swim skill language they use at that location. When you are at home, in the car, or playing outside sing those same songs and try to use similar descriptive language to talk about swimming.

  • Visit the pool before swim lessons

Do everything you can to spend some time together at the swimming pool or location that you will have your swim lessons. The best idea is to get in the water with your child and walk them through getting in the water from the side with assistance and blowing bubbles.

  • Constantly offer support and encouragement in the days before the lessons, immediately before the class at the pool, and after a lesson

Parents are the choreographers of their children’s emotional state. You should present a positive welcoming and happy outward demeanor when you are describing swimming and swim lessons. Tell your child how much fun they are going to have at the pool. Remind them about the fun things that you did together at the pool when you went swimming before the lessons.

  • Parents: acknowledge you child’s fear, but don’t suggest WHY they are afraid

We never want to give the child a reason to be scared. Avoid phrases like, “Are you scared because the water is cold?” or “Are you crying because you’re scared of the teacher?” Instead, explain that there is nothing to fear about swimming lessons.

  • Parents: Hand off your child physically to the swim instructor

Parents of crying children, if they are still leaking tears but not outright breaking down in crying fits, and if you feel they are ready to start their lesson, YOU need to physically walk them to the swim instructor and place their hand in the hands of the swim instructor. You need to do this physical and deliberate act. It conveys trust and ownership.

By walking your child to the swim instructor and placing their hand in the swim instructor’s you are physically telling the child some important things:

1) The parent trusts the swim instructor.

2) The swim instructor is an authority the parent believes in.

3) The parent is passing authority over the child to the swim instructor and they are to be listened to.

Parents! DO NOT force the swim instructor to chase down your child and physically pull them off you. You are destroying the implicit trust in the swim instructor in the child’s eyes.
What should parents do when their child starts crying during a swim lesson:

  • Parents: Do not stare worriedly at your child from the observation area. Very important!!!

When the child is in swim lessons sometimes they will realize you are not with them and burst into tears in a flurry of separation anxiety. This is a dramatic case of a parent equally anxious about their child in swimming lessons conveying quite overtly how uncomfortable and scared they are. Because you are the child’s parent they will gravitate to your mood and emotions and respond accordingly.  Break eye contact or do something else.

• If the child is looking at the parent repeatedly reaching out for them the parent should remove themselves from the child’s sight.

Yup, go hide! Most swim lesson facilities have a secret spot where you can see the classes and watch your child, but the child either can’t see you or doesn’t realize that you’re in view.

Remember that the parent is not the focus of the swim lesson, the child is and the swim instructors will better engage the child when the parent is not also a member of the class.

Some reasons a child cry’s at swimming lessons: 

What causes fear of the water?

• Being forced into water activities with no preparation or expectation given in a hostile or unhelpful environment
• Being raised by parents that are themselves afraid of the water and have knowingly or unknowingly communicated this fear to their children
• Having had a traumatic water accident, or witnessing one
Remember, children LEARN to be afraid of the water.

Parents! DO NOT DO THESE THINGS

  • Stop lessons totally because child cried in the beginning.
  • Be scared for your child. All your anxiety to be picked up and amplified by your child. When you are nervous or uncertain, your child will pick up on all the unspoken and subtle body language and between the lines words you’re using to avoid participating.
  • Offer payoffs. “We’ll get ice cream for your good behavior today at swim lessons.” This reinforces a negative association with swimming lessons and the learning process.

Enrolling your child in swim lessons is an excellent choice. It is important to learn how to at least know the basics of how to swim. USA swimming through their Make a Splash arm has produced these interesting facts:

– Drowning is the 2nd leading cause of childhood accidental death
– Ten people drown each day in the U.S.
– Seven out of ten African-American children cannot swim
– Six out of ten Hispanic children cannot swim
– 40% of Caucasian children have low or no swimming ability
– Children from non-swimming households are eight times more likely to be
at-risk of drowning
– Participation in formal swim lessons can reduce the likelihood of childhood drowning by 88%.
As a prevention measure, swim lessons are a great idea.

 

11 Things NOT to say to a parent of an Only Child

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With a single child households on the rise, it’s time everyone got on board with what onlies and parents of onlies already know: Only children may grow up differently, but they’re just as awesome. I put together this list of comments that I really don’t like to be asked or say.

  1. “He must be really lonely.”

First of all, there’s a difference between being alone and being lonely. I can say that only children are actually less likely to feel lonely because they have more experience being alone. We’re comfortable hanging out with ourselves and often have rich inner lives. That said, it’s important to make sure only children have lots of opportunities to play with other kids, so if you’re really concerned about the sibling-free boy down the street, I’m sure his parents would be happy to send him over for a play date.

  1. “He won’t have anyone to help take care of you when you’re old.”

While this technically may be true, there’s no guarantee that the children in a bigger family will share the work of caring for a parent, anyway. We have all heard about families where one sibling becomes the de fact of caretaker, whether he or she wants to or not. This is a situation that’s impossible to predict, so it’s just hurtful to make someone feel guilty for it.

  1. “It must be so easy with just one child.”

Well, yes and no. Yes, parents of only children don’t have to referee sibling fights, fill out school forms in triplicate, or spend nearly a decade changing diapers. But some of us made that choice because we know that we would have trouble managing a bigger family. When other parents start complaining about the stress of having multiple kids, I resist the urge to remind them that they chose to have a bigger family.

  1. “You’re not a real parent until you have more than one.”

Several parents told me they’d heard variations of this hurtful line, as if only-child moms “fall somewhere between a mother and an aunt on the challenge and commitment spectrum,” as a friend described it. We may have “just” one, but we have the important job of protecting and nurturing that life and feel all the same fears, worries, and boundless love other parents feel.

  1. “You don’t want him to grow up to be spoiled, do you?”

Trust me; parents of only children have internalized this stereotype so deeply that most of us are hyper-vigilant about not “spoiling” our kids. Even so, it’s a given that an only child is going to get more focused attention from his parents. Research shows this is a positive in terms of self-esteem, achievement, and even intelligence.

  1. “You’re selfish for not having another child.”

Does anybody know me or know my situation or the reasons for not to have another baby? That is another topic.

  1. “That must be why he is so shy.”

First of all, there is nothing wrong with being shy or introverted. The shy, withdrawn only-child stereotype is so pervasive that for a long time people believed is true, that is another topic.

  1. “He doesn’t seem like an only child.”

That’s a loaded complement if I’ve ever heard one. All kids have selfish and bratty moments, but only children are more quickly defined by these labels than kids from bigger families. Conversely, some people see an only child who actually has empathy and social skills as a rare unicorn. The reality is that all kids are in the process of acquiring these skills and should be allowed some mistakes as they grow.

  1. “What if he doesn’t have kids and you never get to be a grandmother?”

Well, yes, I’ll be a little disappointed if I never experience being a grandparent, but having more than one child just to ensure it happens doesn’t seem like the smartest gamble. Plenty of people never have kids. I want my child to grow up to be happy with his choices, not with pressure to make me a grandmother.

  1. 1 “Are you having another?”

Variations include “Just one?” and “Don’t you want one of each?” I especially like this sneaky one from the grandparents: “Our friends are asking us if you’re having another baby.” It should go without saying, but these are very personal questions. Some people will be happy to respond that they’re “one and done,” but others may have painful reasons behind their family size—money troubles, marriage problems, medical conditions.

  1. “He needs a sibling.”

I love my child dearly, but I try hard not to give in to him every whim and want, and that includes creating another human being for him to play with. There is no guarantee that siblings will be friends. I felt completely identified in this article Follow my blog for more informative and interesting articles about parenting and motherhood’s experiences.

 

 

Sippy Cup Strategies: Simple Ways to Switch to a Big-Kid Cup


By the time your toddler turned 12 months, he was probably ready to give the bottle the boot. But you may not have been ready to let him toddle around with an open cup, splish-splashing the liquid every which way. The solution? The sippy cup. As time-saving and environmentally friendly devices go (the fewer spills your tot has, the less time you’ll spend cleaning and the fewer paper towels you’ll use), the sippy cup is pure genius. But like all good things, the sippy-cup phase must come to an end. Now that your little one has improved motor coordination, he’s ready to move on and master the open cup (and give up the sippy cup) — and ideally you’re ready to let the milk (or diluted juice) fall where it may.By the time your toddler turned 12 months, he was probably ready to give the bottle the boot. But you may not have been ready to let him toddle around with an open cup, splish-splashing the liquid every which way. The solution? The sippy cup. As time-saving and environmentally friendly devices go (the fewer spills your tot has, the less time you’ll spend cleaning and the fewer paper towels you’ll use), the sippy cup is pure genius. But like all good things, the sippy-cup phase must come to an end. Now that your little one has improved motor coordination, he’s ready to move on and master the open cup (and give up the sippy cup) — and ideally you’re ready to let the milk (or diluted juice) fall where it may.

Why ditch the sippy at all? Some experts believe that prolonged use may interfere with proper speech development. But perhaps the more important reason to give up the sippy cup (and this includes sports-type bottles and cups with built-in straws) is that kids often tote their trusty sippy around with them and suck on juice, milk, or formula all day long. This wouldn’t be a concern if kids just sipped water, but when baby teeth are constantly bathed in sugar (from the milk or juice), that can lead to a mouthful of cavities.

There’s no absolute “best time” for a child to give up the sippy cup. Some experts advise against getting into the sippy-cup habit in the first place and instead recommend introducing the open cup around six to nine months, letting your baby take some tentative sips (while you keep a firm grip on it, of course). To minimize the mess when starting a baby on an open cup, stay in the kitchen, fill the cup with water rather than juice, and put a towel under the high chair. Or better yet, stick him in an empty bathtub or outside in a wading pool and let him experiment. (Always supervise any kind of water play because a small child can drown in as little as one to two inches of water.)

If, however, sippy cups have become a firm fixture in your home (or your day care or nursery school requires them to cut down on spillage), don’t worry that your child has missed a milestone. You can still make the transition to the big-kid cup. But be forewarned: With an older toddler, you may run into some defiance and control issues. To get your tot to give up the sippy cup without too much of a power struggle, try these techniques:

* Make a big deal out of drinking from a regular cup. “See? This is how Mommy drinks. Now you try it.” Toddlers want to do what their parents are doing, so if you point out that you’re drinking from an open cup, chances are your tot will soon follow suit.

* Take your toddler shopping to pick out his own big kid cup. If he has control over which cup he chooses, he’ll be more inclined to take the matter (or cup) into his own hands.

* Enlist your child’s favorite characters. Designs of cups and plastic glasses run the gamut from Spiderman to Dora the Explorer. Find new cups with your toddler’s favorite characters and he may be so pleased with them, he’ll want to give up his old sippy cups.

* Have your tot toss out the “baby cups” himself. This symbolic gesture will help him understand that he’s a big boy now who deserves big boy cups.

* Allow for some leeway. If your day care or preschool requires sippy cups in the classroom, explain to your toddler that there are “school” cups and “home” cups, and at home he drinks from the big-kid cups.

* Serve your toddler’s favorite drink in an open cup only. If your toddler is reluctant to give up the sippy cup, go ahead and let him use it for water. But reserve the open cup for his favorite drink. When he really, really wants that drink, he’ll start using the open cup.

* Try not to stress about the mess. Part of learning to drink from an open cup is learning how to clean up the spills. Plus, toddlers actually enjoy cleaning up (believe it or not, brooms and mops are some favorite toddler toys!). So don’t cry over spilled milk. Hand your little housekeeper a dish towel and let him at it!

Original article from What to Expect
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THE PURE LOVE OF GRANDPARENTS

daddy

 We are seeing a revolution in the way generations connect in America. Grandparents are around us longer than ever because they’re living longer.

But the truth is that for the first time in U.S. history, millions of children are actually vulnerable to having a smaller amount of time with their grandparents than previous generations. According to the latest federal research, while women in the U.S. overall are having fewer babies, mothers between 40 and 54 are having more. The increasing age of motherhood accentuates a dramatic shift that’s been taking shape for decades. Just to make a comparison, in 1972, about 180,000 children were born to mothers 35 and older, and by 2008, that number had more than tripled, to 603,113.

Scientists have long-held that grandparents play an enormous role in children’s intellectual, behavioral, and social development. But where does that leave kids, especially those born from older parents, who may have few or no grandparents in their lives?

The American Academy of Pediatrics and the American Psychological Association have no studies that specifically measure how the non-appearance of grandparents affects a child’s personal growth and development.

There’s value in examining the power of a particular kind of relationship, should you not also investigate the absence of it?

Even that every grandparent is indispensable, my own child  has grandparents from my side but I can’t help feeling that he was also ripped off, because he never got to know his father’s or experience their unique blend of influences. My child only gets one set of maternal grandparents, and the one that belonged to his father is gone.

Even that, I can consider my childhood richer because, for a while at least, I had all my grandparents, to be more specific from my mother’s side most of my years; and I spent half of my life around them enriching my memory until these days.

By My Ten Tiny Toes

Monica